Of Sons, Mothers, and Mother’s Day PTSD

Late Afternoon, Saturday, May 10, 2025, Miami, Florida

Hi, everyone. Sorry, I’m late, but sometimes, rarely, yes, but sometimes – it’s difficult to come up with a good topic for a blog post. Especially when I’m busy with other stuff, such as doing laundry, which is how I spend part of my morning and midday. Add to that a nice helping of post traumatic stress disorder and a side dish of depression, and you get writer’s block.

I believe the primary reason for my discontent is that tomorrow is Mother’s Day. There are other reasons, but tomorrow will be the 10^th anniversary of the last “celebration” of the holiday before Mom died slightly more than two months afterward. It wasn’t a happy occasion; Mom had been bedridden and stricken by dementia for almost half a decade at that point, my half-sister was making my life more difficult at a time when she should have been more supportive and understanding; and I knew, intuitively, that Mom wouldn’t be around to see Mother’s Day 2016.

I still went through the expected motions that hot, stress-filled, and depressing late spring of 2015. I ordered the Blu-ray version of Evita (the 1996 movie starring Madonna as Eva Peron in Alan Parker’s film adaptation of Andrew Lloyd Webber’s biographical musical drama) as my last Mother’s Day gift, hoping that Mom would be able to follow its story, even though by May 2015 her ability to follow narratives (especially on TV now that she wasn’t reading anymore) was greatly diminished.  

I also tried, without much success, to not let my half-sister get under my skin, but it seemed that the closer our mother’s last days drew nearer, the harder it was for the two of us to get along. We’d never had a good, healthy relationship as adults even under the best of circumstances; now that Mom was only a few weeks away from going into hospice care, several decades’ worth of resentments and mutual dislike came to the fore and never went away.

I won’t go into the details of Mother’s Day 2015, but it was the saddest observance of the holiday. It wasn’t just because my mom, due to her dementia, couldn’t enjoy the last movie I bought for her. It was also because my half-sister was still intent on playing her one-upmanship games, which she loved to indulge in during special occasions. If I brought Mom a movie and a Mother’s Day card, my half-sister would show up with not just a card, but also a shiny Mylar balloon adorned with “Happy Mother’s Day,” several bouquets, and other extravagant gifts, all to showcase her “generosity” for everyone to see.

So, yeah. Mother’s Day 2015 is one of the few occurrences of the holiday that I wish I could sandblast out of my memories. (The others between 2010 and 2014, which also took place in that last half-decade period of Mom’s life…those I try to forget, too.)

As I reflect on the approaching Mother’s Day, I’ll do my best to steer my thoughts away from the darker memories of Mom’s final years and focus instead on the joyful celebrations we shared before 2010—those sweet moments of laughter, love, and connection that remind me of the strong bond we had as parent and child.

On another note, I’d like to invite you to explore my latest novel, Reunion: Coda, which is now available on Amazon. The book has been described as “a heartfelt exploration of the choices that define us, the connections that sustain us, and the hope that guides us on the journey of self-discovery.” If you haven’t yet grabbed a copy, the Kindle edition is being offered under a Kindle Countdown promotion for just 99 cents until Tuesday on Amazon US. I hope you’ll take advantage of this special offer and discover the story that so many readers have found compelling and heartfelt.