Musings & Thoughts for July 21, 2020: A Quick Update

Hi, Constant Reader. I’m a bit pressed for time right now, but I just wanted to share an update about my toxic sibling Vicky.

Yesterday, while I was checking my email accounts – yes, I have several – I found a response to an email I wrote in March to Vicky’s cousin Juan Manuel. In that missive, I had asked him to make sure that Vicky took care of herself during the COVID-19 pandemic. (She has never been the stay-at-home type, even though she was a nurse for many years.)

This is what Juan Manuel said:

Talking about Vicky: It seems to me that you are or have been very outdated about her health: the hip replacement surgery was really fine and while doing the prescribed therapy  – that she was doing very successfully – one of those unlucky breaks, she tripped and fell down and it was a complete disaster. Her femur broke and the operation had to be repeated or done all over again. The process was really traumatic and very painful. The person who has been really helpful to her has been Mauricio. He’s the one that Vicky can count with for everything she needs. Hospital, medical visits, doctors, therapy again, pharmacy and general errands just to mention some. The whole thing was a mess. I wanted to update you in case you didn’t know.

About the virus pandemic she’s been doing OK since she’s very limited due to the surgery etc and the fact that her right knee is constantly hurting a lot. Best regards. JM

Well, that sucks.

Here’s my reply:

Dear JM. 

Unfortunately, I am out of touch with Vicky’s current health situation because of the tragic situation between us. She made it abundantly clear, in her words at the courthouse on July 7, 2016 and by rejecting a gift that I sent her in 2018 to try and mend fences, that she didn’t want anything to do with me, especially after she lost in court. Nobody on her end, except for you, has kept me informed of her medical issues. At least you know, through these emails, that even though I have no interest in trying to reach out to her directly, I am still her closest living relative and concerned about her, for our late mother’s sake more than anything else.

I don’t think it would be a good idea for me to send her any messages through you, so I will not say “Tell Vicky I said ‘hello.'” She would not believe it was sincere, for one thing.

Second, even if she did think it was sincere, it doesn’t change anything; I’m where I am in no small part because of her desire to get half of the house and sell it without even bothering to tell me. She already had a real estate agent and a buyer.

The only reason Mom ever agreed to the original will Vicky convinced her to sign back in 2000 was because she figured Vicky would help me keep the townhouse – even if it meant that we could not live under the same roof.

When Mom found out shortly before her back surgery operation what Vicky’s true intentions were…well, that’s when Mom decided, on her own and with witnesses present, that a new will needed to be drawn up. I was initially opposed to it because I knew it would lead to an unhappy rift between Vicky and me…it was Mom who had to convince me that it was the best thing to do. 

That having been said, I am distressed that Vicky fell and broke her hip. That is a serious medical condition, and that is how our grandfather Quique died. I do wish her a full and quick recovery, and I also thank Mauricio for being there for her. She needs people around to help and take care of her.

As for me: I have not gone out much because of the COVID-19 pandemic. I’ve gone out a few times to run errands – mostly to deposit checks – and last week I did so wearing a mask for the first time. It was given to me by my host family, with whom I have been for over four years now without major conflicts or drama. There are, of course, differences of opinion and minor arguments, but mainly we all get along well. For my birthday, and I think I told you this before, we went to Hollywood Studios to see (mostly) the Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge attraction. Of course, by then we were beginning to worry about COVID-19, so even though we stayed at the resort for two and a half days and went to the park two, there was a lot of COVID-19 angst in the background, so it was a bit more stressful than in previous outings. (Disney closed the parks about a week and a half after we came home, so…we got lucky.)

Anyway, thank you for letting me know about Vicky’s hip issues and her recovery. 

Best regards to you, Barbara, and your adult kids. 

Anyway, I gotta log off, but I’ll be back later, hopefully with a review or other fun article.