Challenging Day in New Hampshire: A Personal Account

Mid-to-Late Morning, Saturday, August 10, 2024, Madison, New Hampshire

It’s just a few hours past dawn, and I’m in my writing nook watching the skies clear up. The last of a storm named Debby is drifting away towards the Atlantic and Nova Scotia. At 6:30 this morning, I groggily woke from a fitful sleep; whether it was still raining then, I’m not sure, but the water droplets clinging to the windows hinted at a night full of rain.

The forecast predicts a bright, sun-soaked day with temperatures soaring by New Hampshire’s measure. Yesterday, however, felt as dreary as my spirits, courtesy of the lingering presence of Debby. The sky was cloaked in somber gray, and the temperature lingered in the upper 60s. Though it didn’t pour during the day, there was a persistent, gentle mist during my two lengthy afternoon strolls.

Overall, my Friday was frustrating. Having slept poorly the night before, I could only manage essential activities, like taking walks to get fresh air and exercise to avoid cramps at night. I also missed my Remeron yesterday, which caused a lot of anxiety. Since I need a calm and comfortable space to write (a creative cocoon, so to speak), I couldn’t work on Reunion: Coda. My mind was too unsettled and overwhelmed with worry to dive into the world of Jim Garraty and New York City in March 2000.  

I need to stop thinking about moving back to Florida and why I moved to New Hampshire in the first place. If not, my anxiety will increase, and without insurance approval for my Remeron prescription, my misery will worsen.

I’ll really try to keep a positive outlook today, but it’s challenging. My dearest friends are either miles away or, heartbreakingly, no longer with us, so I’m left to navigate this journey alone. Packing is another hurdle; I lack the skill, so—despite the looming inquiry of “Why not pack yourself?”—I have to hold out for help at month’s end, adding an extra layer of anxiety.

I need to stop thinking about moving back to Florida and why I moved to New Hampshire in the first place. If not, my anxiety will increase, and without insurance approval for my Remeron prescription, my misery will worsen.

Last night, with some help from my buddy Juan Carlos Hernandez, I started the preliminary steps to outline Scene Five of Reunion: Coda’s The Storm Breaks (aka Chapter 19). If I can overcome my anxiety, I might be able to work on my novel even for a little bit.

But before I do that, I think I’ll go out for a walk.